Monday, 22 December 2008


I am a hypocrite. I cannot help it, no one can. If you are alive and able to speak, you are bound to contradict yourself.

So please accept me for who I am and do not confuse me with the message. One teaches what one needs most to learn and that is how and why I am writing this, to learn what I need to.

I have come to these words by not living them. The experience behind being disposed to putting them down is the soil from which they grow. As I discover the new, as my awareness increases, I reach a little beyond and write the insights out, which takes me that bit closer, too. Equally, as soon as I write something, I violate it.

If someone does what I feel is offensive, it is just a matter of time before I see myself doing it. The more upset I get about them, the more jarring is my realisation about myself. If I try to simply let the perceived injustice be what it is, I feel unresolved, and if I speak out about it, it resolves by being reflected back at me.

All of which encourages me to reserve judgement, be real, and have a sense of humour. It encourages me to be conscious of how life works, of who I am not and, most important, who I am.

Self-acceptance and understanding bring with them a transcendence of the self.

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